Indricotherium Love
Adriana, 14
"Be the change you wish to see in the world." ~Gandhi
- Socialism: You have 2 cows and you give one to your neighbor.
- Communism: You have 2 cows; the Government takes both and gives you some milk.
- Fascism: You have 2 cows; the Government takes both and sells you some milk.
- Nazism: You have 2 cows; the Government takes both and shoots you.
- Bureaucratism: You have 2 cows; the Government takes both, shoots one, milks the other and throws the milk away..
- Traditional Capitalism: You have 2 cows. You sell one and buy a bull. You herd multiplies, and the economy grows. You sell them and retire on the income.
- An American Corporation: You have 2 cows. You sell one, and force the other to produce the milk of four cows. Later, you hire a consultant to analyze why the cow dropped dead.
- A French Corporation: You have 2 cows. You go on strike because you want three cows.
- Japanese Corporation: You have 2 cows. You redesign them so they are one-tenth the size of an ordinary cow and produce twenty times the milk. You then create a clever cow cartoon image called Cowkimon and market them Worldwide.
- An Italian Corporation: You have 2 cows, but you don't know where they are. You break for lunch.
- A Swiss Corporation: You have 5000 cows. None of which belong to you. You charge others for storing them.
- Chinese Corporation: You have 2 cows. You have 300 people milking them. You claim full employment, high bovine productivity, and arrest the newsman who reported the numbers.
- An Iraqi Corporation: Everyone thinks you have lots of cows. You tell them that you have none. No one believes you and they bomb your arse. You still have no cows, but at least now you are part of a Democracy.......
- Counter Culture: 'Wow, dig it, like there's these 2 cows, man, grazing in the hemp field. You gotta have some of this milk!'
- Surrealism: You have two giraffes. The government requires you to take harmonica lessons.
- Fatalist: You have 2 doomed cows...
- A West-Country Corporation: You have 2 cows. That one on the left is kinda cute.
- A Brazilian Corporation: You have 2 cows. You pay taxes for 6 cows. You have to sell one cow in order to pay the taxes. Your remaining cow gets sick and dies while waiting for availability in the public vet hospital.
- Moffat: You have two cows. Both of them are your daughters time traveling from the past where they had a brief love affair with Da Vinci making you the rightful Queen of England.
- An Irish Corporation: You have a million cows because they're everywhere
- Tumblr: You have 2 cows. You ship them together and make GIF posts screaming about how much you love your cows, but they should stop existing because they are so perfect.
If when straight people got married we kept saying “straight marriage” instead of just “marriage” they’d probably get pissed off
Lyrics:In ‘85,
Tuesday morning,
Came alive,
I didn’t know ya
Route 66 is gone,
And Reagan’s here,
It won’t be long
Nintendo comes,
Live Aid, too,
Back to the Future
Where were you,
While I spent all my days
In Catholic school?
In ‘89,
The dream begins,
First in line to California,
Pete Rose is banned for good,
The Simpsons come to Hollywood,
Russia leaves Afghanistan,
Flight 103 ends Pan Am,
Bush is here
This is the year
That I feel most alone
No more
Countin’ down the hours
No more
Wishin’ you were here
I stopped believin’,
Although Journey told me ‘don’t’
Before I call it a day,
Maybe this’ll be my year
Maybe this’ll be my year
Maybe this’ll be my year
Maybe this’ll be my year
In ‘92,
A boy is born,
The skies were blue
In Ohio
Boris Yeltsin chills,
Freddie dies,
But Queen is still,
Barcelona has the games,
Lady Di is single again,
Clinton wins,
And I still dream
That I’ll find you someday
In ‘97,
A baby girl,
Adds some heaven to the world,
Tony Blair tips the scales,
Elton sings for the Princess of Wales,
Microsoft buys into Mac,
My dad has a second heart attack,
And Train leaves San Francisco
In a thousand-dollar van
No more
Countin’ down the hours
No more
Wishin’ you were here
I stopped believin’,
Although Journey told me ‘don’t’
Before I call it a day,
Maybe this’ll be my year
Maybe this’ll be my year
Maybe this’ll be my year
Maybe this’ll be my year
2001,
The towers fell,
The World is stunned,
I wish I knew ya
I was on a plane,
The world would never be the same
The artificial heart is born—
Ironic when New York’s is torn out
Woah-oah-oah-oah
2004,
Began in May,
On tour when I met ya
Facebook joins the Internet,
Oldsmobile joins the cassette
I met your family
It took a while until you kissed me,
But when you did,
I finally felt at home
I stopped believin’,
Although Journey told me ‘don’t’
Before I call it a day,
Maybe this’ll be my year
Maybe this’ll be my year
Maybe this’ll be my year
Maybe this’ll be my year
2012,
And all I know
Is everybody comes and goes
Everybody sings and cries,
Makes the grade and takes the prize
In somethin’, nothin’, I don’t care,
Because I always know that you’ll be here
With me
romney you light up my rage like nobody else
the way that you flip your views gets me overwhelmed
but when you smile at the crowd it ain’t hard to tell
you don’t know oh oh
you don’t know you’re a dumbass
(via kaitlynisfinallyhere)
